Goodbye Chloe

So I log onto Facebook today and I have a message from Chloe. It's a huge message. I thought about just trying to sum it up but I figured this would be easier and then you all would get the whole thing.

I haven't moved on. I know that we both said it won't work out and that it wasn't supposed to work out when we wanted it to. But I still daydream. I still wish. I dream of ways that we will rekindle while I am up in Idaho. I still imagine what it would be like if we are married. I still imagine us. I haven't moved on.
As of right now I don't think I can either. Just talking to you and be in contact with makes me hope. I've lead myself to believe that what we had between us was too great and that eventually we would work it out. As long as I think this I won't be able to emotionally move on. It isn't fair to me. I still love you. I still want us and it is apparent that you have moved on. You found someone else that and that hurts me. It hurts me to think of you holding her hand, of hugging her, of cuddling, of sharing your day, of laughing with her, and most of all of kissing her. It hurts me.
My whole purpose of staying your friend was to make this easier. I thought that if I stayed your friend I could move on. That we could still have that emotional connection and that it wouldn't bother me. That we could still be friends without anything else. But I can't do that because I have never done that. I have only been your friend while I am your girlfriend. I think that always in my mind as long as we laugh and we are friends that I will always want more because more was wonderful. More was everything that girls wish for. For me it was a fairy tale. But I can't have more . I shouldn't hope and wish for more. Because we are over. I can't keep lying to myself and say that we can only be friends and that is ok with me because it isn't. I will always want to be more. I will want back what we had. I want to be the girl that you want to talk to all the time. The girl that you hug and kiss. The girl that you share your day with. I want that but I know that it isn't possible.
It hurts me a little bit each time we talk. It hurts me to know that I still want you but you have moved on. It hurts and I am tired of hurting. I don't want to hurt anymore. I don't deserve to hurt anymore.
I need to move on. I need to move on emotionally and not still connect my future with you.
So what I am getting down to is that I can't be your friend right now. I don't know if I can ever be your friend. I hope so. I hope that one day we can be friends without me wanting more. I hope that I can but right now I can't and I would be fooling myself thinking I can.
So this is goodbye. I don't know if it is forever or how long it will be for but it is goodbye for now.
I hope that this coming up year goes well for you.
I love you

Chloe

Well there you have it. Oh and I checked and she and I are no longer friends on Facebook. Right after logging in, her little sister started chatting with me and the first thing she says to me is that I'm a jerk because I didn't call Chloe up and tell her that I have a girlfriend. Do I wish Chloe doesn't have to hurt? Yes. Do I care that her sister thinks I'm a jerk? No. I honestly feel that I did the best with the circumstances that I could have done. She told me she didn't want to hear about me going on dates or girls that I like. So I didn't tell her. Apparently that makes me a jerk. Oh well I'll survive having a 17 year old think I'm a jerk. Somehow. Lol. But it sounds as this may be the end of the Chloe chapters. Goodbye Chloe.